I know I took advantage of the “bait the hook” of writing in the title to this blog post. I did that purposefully because if the title compelled you to cringe – even just a little bit – just know that I do as well.
And that is exactly why this word is so important to me.
I am the granddaughter of a pastor.
I am the daughter of a woman who has been in the limelight in ministry for my entire life.
As I head into my mid-forties, I am having to acknowledge how deeply I have allowed their roles in ministry to dictate my behavior. I am also having to acknowledge the obvious, which is of course I felt pressure from my grandfather and my mother to be the model pastor’s kid. I was very, very good at it.
My word for the year 2017 is something altogether different.
My word
BadAss
written just so –
represents for me this idea of shedding the need to project badassery as a form of rebellion, and instead embrace it as a calling.
For many of us women who grew up as the daughters of great ministers of faith, especially in the 80’s and 90’s, there is this double edged sword of desiring to use the family name as leverage to get where we want in life and at the same time, rejecting all notion of a connection because we are our own person and desire to make our own way. Muddled into that particular push and pull is the fact that we grew up in a predominantly patriarchal world which made it abundantly clear that there would be consequences if we did not adhere to the oppressive adage of “being seen and not heard”. Often, rebellion ensues due to such frustration in feeling trapped and stifled.
My mom and I talked about this at length recently. The irony is that my mom is also no stranger to the push and pull I felt growing up because as a female minister/leader and a pastor’s kid herself, she too has had to confront some of the same obstacles to a much greater extent than I, and with much greater risk to her both personally and professionally.
So, this word for 2017 represents not only where I am going, but also honors those women like my Mom who have come before me.
More than ever in my lifetime, I believe there is a need for BadAss women.
When I think of what it means to be a BadAss, I believe that as the name connotes, it is uncomfortable and controversial. It requires courage and a sense of determination.
I believe that being a BadAss woman also requires a maturity and wisdom that comes with age and experience, understanding the rebelliousness and a desire to elicit shock and awe are detrimental on all kinds of levels, both personally and collectively.
We do not need more noise.
We need more purpose of vision and the stamina and patience and grace to see it through.
We need to ensure that we respond to what the Giver of All Things has already made clear to us as Truth – that we are not to contrive purpose that emanates from judgment or fear or false righteousness that elevates us over another, but that we are to live out of a place of boldness and love, fueled by justice and mercy, coupled with humility.
That is what I want to be in 2017.
That is what BadAss means to me.
Perhaps we can link our one words for 2017 as women into a tapestry that is a force to be reckoned with this year.
I hope you will join me.
